When standing, the higher the steeple, the greater the power differential. Also, women in positions of power will sometimes do a reverse steeple with fingers together and palms apart but the fingers are pointing downward. If you are talking with a person of higher power and he or she starts to steeple, try asking a question that requires a verbal answer.
That may break the steeple as the individual would be talking through his or her hands. There is also a bouncing steeple motion where the fingers are separated and then brought back together. That would usually indicate impatience on the part of the listener, so if you see this, immediately give the other person the floor. You may have noticed that Donald Trump is often seen using the steepling technique as well as the bouncing steeple to indicate impatience.
His gestures are very marked. For example, Donald often sits with his arms crossed. It looks uncomfortable when wearing a suit, but it is how he habitually demonstrates his power. I will discuss arm crossing in a future article. Some people use the steepling gesture a lot and others rarely use it. When you see it being done, it provides clues into what the other person is thinking.
Steepling is rarely seen from a person in a lower status when talking with a superior. If you see this, some form of a coup is likely being attempted.
Test to see what may be happening. Excessive use of steepling will lower the trust between people because it represents a kind of power play. Try to use this gesture sparingly in your relations with others. He is the author of four books: 1. For example, Roman history shows that a low-status person could be executed for interrupting Julius Caesar. Today, most people live in societies where freedom of speech in the abstract teems reasonably well, if for no other reason than the proliferation of mobile phones and social media.
Usually anyone who wants to put forward an opinion can do so. In many countries, the hands have taken on the role of 'punctuation marks' to regulate turn-taking in physical conversation. A raised hands gesture has been borrowed from the Italians and French, who are the biggest users of 'hand talking'.
In Italy, the order of talking is simple - the person with his hands raised has the floor and does the talking. The listener will have his hands down or behind his back. So the trick is to try to get your hands in the air if you want to get a word in and this can be done either by looking away and then raising them or by touching the other person's arm to suppress their hand as you raise yours.
Many people assume that when Italians talk they are being friendly or intimate because they continually touch each other, but in fact each is attempting to restrict the other's hands and take the floor.
Watching how a person summarizes a discussion giving both points of view can reveal whether they have a bias one way or another. They usually hold one hand palm up and articulate each point and then give the opposing points on the other hand.
Right-handed people reserve their favored point of view for their right hand and left-handers favor their left. Using hand gestures grabs attention, increases the impact of communication and helps individuals retain more of the information they are hearing. An analysis of TED Talks found that the most popular, viral speakers used an average of around hand gestures, which is nearly twice as many as the least popular speakers used.
Other research has found that people who "talk" with their hands tend to be viewed as warm, agreeable and energetic, while those who are less animated are seen as logical, cold and analytical. Evaluating the retention of information in memory, researchers Geoffrey Beattie and Nina McLoughlin at the University of Manchester conducted a study where volunteers listened to stories featuring cartoon characters.
For some listeners, a narrator added hand gestures such as moving the hands up and down quickly to show running, a waving movement to demonstrate a hair dryer and arms wide apart to show a fat opera singer. When the listeners were tested ten minutes later, those who had seen the hand gestures had up to a third higher response when recalling the details of the stories, demonstrating the material effect hand gestures have on our recall ability.
Out at a restaurant for dinner one night with a friend we discussed summer vacation plans. As the vision of the plans expanded and became more of a reality this friend broadly smiled, rubbed her palms together rapidly and exclaimed, 'I can barely wait!
Rubbing the palms together is a way in which people communicate positive expectation. The dice thrower rubs the dice between his palms as a sign of his positive expectancy of winning, the master of ceremonies rubs his palms together and says to his audience, 'We have been looking forward to hearing our next speaker,' and the excited salesperson struts into the sales manager's office, rubs his palms together and says excitedly, 'We've just nailed down the Johnson contract!
The speed at which a person rubs their palms together signals who he thinks will receive the positive benefits. Say, for example, you want to buy a home and you visit an estate agent. After describing the property you want, the agent rubs his palms together quickly and says, 'I've got just the right house for you! How would you feel if he rubbed his palms together very slowly as he told you that he had the ideal property?
He'd seem sneaky or devious and you'd get the feeling that he expected the results to benefit him, not you. Salespeople are taught to use the palm rub gesture when describing products or services to prospective buyers, and to use rapid hand action to avoid putting buyers on the defensive.
When a customer quickly rubs his palms together and says, 'Let's see what you have to offer! Always remember context: a person who rubs his palms together briskly while standing at a train station on a cold winter day may not necessarily be doing it because he's expecting the train momentarily. More likely he does it because his hands are cold. Rubbing the thumb against the index finger or fingertips is commonly used as a money expectancy gesture. Its symbolism is that of rubbing a coin between the thumb and fingertips.
Think back to a time when you were really scared, nervous, or holding back a strong negative emotion. Chances are that you were clenching your hands for all you were worth and your knuckles were a bright white: the stronger the emotion, the tighter the clench.
In addition to the strength of the clench you can also take meaning from where the clenched hands are placed. Studies indicate that the higher the hands are held in the clenched position the stronger the negative mood. So, if your boss is sitting with her elbows resting on her desk and her hands are clenched in front of her face, she's probably going to be difficult to handle. By putting her hands near her mouth she's indicating that she's holding back what she would like to say.
Be careful not to push her too far. She just may unclench those hands and let the words fly At first, this gesture can seem to signal confidence as some people who use it often also smile. Research into the clenched hands position by negotiation experts Nierenberg and Calero showed that it was also a frustration gesture when used during a negotiation, signalling that the person was holding back a negative or anxious attitude.
It was a position assumed by a person who felt they were either not convincing the other person or thought they were losing the negotiation.
The hands clenched gesture has three main positions: hands clenched in front of the face; hands clenched resting on the desk or on the lap; and, when standing, hands clenched in front of his genitals. In his studies of body movements, Ray Birdwhistell noted that people viewing themselves as reputable and among the elite had minimalist gestures and tended to use a restricted 'steepled' finger position to demonstrate their confident attitude. You can achieve this position by letting your finger tips lightly touch like the steeple on a building.
Lawyers, accountants, and anyone in a position of authority frequently give instructions or advice with their fingers in this position. People who consider themselves more elevated in formal or informal power often use this gesture and, by doing so, signal their confident attitude.
So far, we've emphasized that gestures come in clusters, like words in a sentence, and that they must be interpreted in the context in which you observe them. Steepling can be an exception to these rules, as it often occurs in isolation. The fingers of one hand lightly press against those of the other hand to form a church steeple and will sometimes oscillate back and forth like a spider doing push-ups on a mirror. The raised steeple: When the fingers are raised in front of the chest, the speaker is giving thoughts or opinions.
Use the raised steeple position judiciously. Taken to extremes it can convey an arrogant 'know-it-all' attitude. If you tilt your head backwards when taking this position don't be surprised if you're perceived as smug or arrogant. Those who use this gesture sometimes convert steepled hands unconsciously into a praying gesture in an attempt to appear more God-like. As a general rule, raised steepled hands should be avoided when you want to be persuasive or win the other person's confidence.
The lowered steeple: When you're listening you may find your fingers in the lowered steeple position. So did A-Rod when he talked about using banned substances.
I see many people do it when they're trying to hide an emotion too uncomfortable to share. I call it steepling. Oprah steeples, as does Donald Trump just before he says 'You're fired. If you're just chatting and not divulging, feel free to tilt your head, but mind the direction: If you tilt to your right, you're seen as more attractive, and if you tilt to your left, you're viewed as more intelligent.
But if you're among friends, cross away! It can help you figure out a problem, because the action uses both sides of your body, engaging both sides of your brain: the logical left and the creative right.
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